Nothing worth having comes easy. This is especially true about marriage. The good ones don’t come easy. They don’t fall in your lap and stay a bed of roses. You have to cultivate the marriage and constantly pull out the weeds.
Marriage is a lot like gardening. It needs tending. There are seeds planted. There has to be nutrients given to keep the garden growing. Bugs have to be kept away. Animals have to be kept at bay. You have to nurture and protect your marriage.
You have to want to make your marriage work. This is true about anything you are attempting to do. If you aren’t truly wanting to succeed at it, you will undoubtedly fail. How much do you want your marriage to work? The answer to that will determine the work you put into it. You’ll be more deliberate in your actions.
Before you act, you’ll think. About what? Think of how your decisions and your words will impact your partner. Think of how your actions will hurt or help your marriage. Don’t just move forward, thinking all will be well. Be deliberate doing things that will help your marriage and won’t hurt it.
Make time for your partner. Set aside moments to just enjoy being with them. Send them notices throughout the day, letting them know you are thinking of them. Turn off the TV and just talk to each other. Turn down offers to go out with friends to do something with your partner. Be deliberate!
It’s not all fun and games. When things get tough, you will have to work together. Work to keep the house clean, deal with an issue with a child, face the family’s judgement together, work on how to spend your money wisely, be willing to compromise when you’re at an impasse.
How does a group of people successfully build a house? By working together. Otherwise, it would never get done or be completed in such a way that it could never be lived in. The same can be said about marriage. The parties involved have to work together to keep it solid. They can’t be on opposite sides, pulling at each other.
Keep in mind that success can only be found if you work together. Compromise. Come up with a solution that makes all parties happy.
Learn From Mistakes
Nobody is perfect. Each part of a marriage is falliable. One might say the wrong thing or with the wrong tone. We make assumptions. We make bad decisions. We shouldn’t expect to be perfect in the relationship. In fact, we should expect to make mistakes. The key to success in a marriage is to learn from those mistakes.
What could you have done better? What lesson have you learned from the mistake? Don’t ignore the mistakes or brush them aside. Analyze them and work through them. Your marriage will be stronger for it.